Terribilia meditans

by videosforpictures

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1.
03:18
2.
3.
01:34
4.
04:04
5.
04:33
6.
03:42
7.
02:22
8.
03:12
9.

about

thanks for listening.

piano, vocals, amplifier - jay lancaster
artwork - gianna constantine (giannaconstantine.blogspot.com)

credits

released 22 August 2014

tags

license

all rights reserved

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Track Name: Purple Iris
I was waiting for a long time.
I was waiting for you.
I was waiting for the silence to end.

I was waiting for a long time.
I was waiting for you.
I was waiting for the silence to end.

And I heard your voice.
You said: "it's a long way down."

Purple iris, disappeared, into the ground.
Evaporated into soil and gentle dust.

And I heard your voice.
You said: "it's a long way down."
Track Name: Mise En Place
(1, 2, 3, 4)

Cut the meat off the fish's bones.
Throw the organs in the trash.
Start the stove and put some oil in the pan.
We're gonna taste his minerals tonight.
A drowned man's minerals tonight.

Set the table and wash your hands 'fore you eat.
Get the plates out from up top.
Say grace to God and tie the napkin to your neck.
We're gonna taste his minerals tonight.
A drowned man's minerals tonight.
Track Name: Cold Boy
The head was dipped into a case of ice
to void the summer heat.
In a backyard shed, with the curtains drawn and dim
to void the summer heat.
All the clothes removed and in a single heap
to void the summer heat.
Pushing in and out into another person's skull
to void the summer heat.

Oh, cold boy, drunk in late July.
Sitting in the dark, taking off his shirt.
The girls all want to be him, the others want to feed him.
Cold boy, drunk in late July.
Track Name: Lemonade
Nested underneath a hill.
Waiting for someone to bring me my fill
as a queen and controller,
as a fucker and ruler.

Nested underneath a hill.
Waiting for sugary droplets -
a sweet little liquid trail,
from you to me.

Don't ever let me down.
I depend on you, you depend on me
I will give you life, you will give me seed.
Bring me what I need.
In my nectar throes, not a second late
or I'll swallow your head and spit out your teeth.

Lemonade

Nested underneath a hill.
Less and less of my kids coming home.
Some have staggered back in the middle of the night;
I smell the chemical on their breath.

Nested underneath a hill.
Feeling like I've been forgotten.
Slowly shriveled up from the missing drink,
a massive black ball on the sidewalk, though I said:

Don't ever let me down.
I depend on you, you depend on me
I will give you life, you will give me seed.
Bring me what I need.
In my nectar throes, not a second late
or I'll swallow your head and spit out your teeth.

Lemonade
Track Name: In The Drink
The holiest water I ever drank
came from the ship you steered through the ice.
And as it sank to the bottom, I was lodged inside the cabin
feeling peaceful and resigned.

It dripped to my lungs and pierced through my skin.
I breathed in the cold til it couldn't come in.
And in the dark, I was floating facing down towards the seafloor
feeling peaceful and resigned.

(The holiest, holiest, holiest water -
the holiest water trapped in my mouth.)
Dusk, waiting with her head in her hands.
At dusk, waiting with her head in her hands.

--
The holiest water I ever drank
came from the ship you steered through the ice.
And as it sank to the bottom, I was lodged inside the cabin
feeling peaceful and resigned.
Track Name: Open
Oh the day's mystery waned.
A snake snuck into open cracks of my skull.
And it nested there and it laid its eggs
and it shed its skin and died.

Locked, covered in paint,
hidden away in a storage box
in a golden safe, in a faraway bank
where my burns opened up anew.

Opened up anew

Oh the day's mystery waned.
The attic collapsed from the fire they lit.
And the people upstairs
and the secrets they held
all shed their skin and died.

Locked, covered in paint,
muscles that clenched inside my mouth
in a second spit, in a second's time,
the burns opened up and decalcified.

Opened up anew

Spine evaporated into keys.
Jingling softly, never opening anything.
Track Name: Wire
I woke on a wire.
Can't tell if I want to step off.
Someone is whispering yes.
Someone is whispering no.

From 40,000 ft up,
I can't breathe the air for much longer
and I want to go home.
Track Name: Cara
Oh, lookit the day's gone.
Dusk has come to take all the sunlight away.
Everything is falling apart to dull gray.
Oh, lookit the day's gone.

Oh, lookit the day's gone.
Cara wants to burrow the knives in her mouth.
Cara wants to know what it's like to dry out.
Oh, lookit the day's gone.

Oh, lookit the day's gone.
Oh, Cara...
Track Name: Good Dream Revised
Nothing changes, old routines
play themselves out on infinite repeat.
I seize up - a nervous ticking -
polyester fumes to the brain.

No weight this late.
Good dreams await.

Yeah at night I get to walk along the beach
and fall asleep there.
And feel better about the ways
in which I'm dying.
But nothing changes, old routines:
the back of my eyes in the dark of the night,
the sight of my skin in the lights of the cars,
the sand in my hair and the air with me now.

No weight this late.
Good dreams await.

To sleep just long enough to forget who you are when you wake the next day.